Updates

Some updates as of 24.11.2014

1) I lost my phone. Goodbye phone, I will miss you much. Thanks for accompanying me through hard times. You have been a very good friend all these years. When I found out you were lost, it felt like I had lost a piece of me because we are so overly attached together. To the person who took my phone, can you please return it? Be kind to others and you will be showered with lots of blessings.

2) I found out that cooking is pretty fun. You can mix everything you feel like putting into a saucepan then it will turn out well and cooked. I manage to cook stir fry pasta with salmon, mom must be very proud of me. *spotlight shines*

3) Criminology is hard. I don't even know what would I take this subject in the first place? Marxism, Dahrendorf, Austin Turk.. what's that?!

4) My Criminology lecturer is from Oxford University. She is pretty elegant. When she tied her hair up, wow, just WOW...

5) I am in Christmas mood. I am curios how Christmas is celebrated here but I can see the town and the malls are already decorated and Christmas songs are played everywhere.

6) Despite I meet a lot of friends here, I still feel lonely deep inside.

7) I have been slacking a lot. Most of the time I am thinking what to cook. I really need to kickstart my study with more discipline.

8) What phone should I get?

9) I lost my campus card along with my phone. I went to make another one and surprisingly, the picture taken turns out pretty well. I wonder do they allow us to upload selfies as well?

10) Chandelier (acoustic version) by Sia has been playing in my head for the whole day.

On Love

The most difficult part in Love :

when you care for a person who you love , 

and you know they are the wrong one but you still hope they will change someday. 

My piece of story

Here's a story; my story which I am not ashamed to tell. 

Puberty do me no good. Like everyone else, nobody really pay attention to me, just an ordinary outcasted student. I am glad I have passed through that phase of life. And we change for a reason.

 This is me around 2006 - 2007.

I remember this picture is taken around 2007 I think.

This is me in 2012, my gap year

I googled on how to reduce weight. At that point, I was thinking only to reduce my BMI into normal instead of obese. I also start to reduce fatty food intake - soft drinks, fast food, canned food, rice. Well, I didn't really completely eliminate them, just reduce some of them. I still have cheat meals every now and then. 

I exercise a lot. Really a lot. I have no idea what to exercise and how to do it. I practically have no idea and all I do is to move my body, literally anywhere. Then I start to learn from the internet and I start to take baby steps. I used some K-Pop celebs as my motivation - talk about the newly debuted EXO in 2012. (I like them cause most of them are almost same age as me).

 I almost give up for the first few months because I don't see any results. I remembered during the third month, my weight suddenly dropped 3/4 kgs. I was over the moon. 

And that is the point when it starts to get a little bit extreme. I exercise a lot, everyday, until I vomit in the toilet. There was one time when my vision went blurry and I had difficulty in breathing after doing some strenuous exercise. My father had to sit me down on the sofa and brought me a hot towel. For me, numbers of KG matter the most. I remembered I almost fainted before (practically lying on the floor), where my mom almost called the ambulance for help. My face were pale and my lips were white. I think I develop a mild anorexia too - but I keep it to myself and didn't tell anyone. 

Then, I started to realise that I need to stop doing everything I am doing now. What is the point if this is not making me healthy at all? I start to slow down my exercise routine, take up some good fibre food, fish and lean meat, replenish the nutrient of the body by taking more fruits and water, and wow, my weight dropped even more than last time! That is when I learn that we have to eat to lose weight and it is the food you put into your mouth that matter. 

My first year of college. 

My final year. 

I still retain some loose skin and stretch marks on my body and it can be corrected through surgery or applying bio-oil (but I am too lazy to do that). 

Many people said I had changed over the years. Yeah I had changed physically but I am still the the boy who used to be fat before - I retain my values, teachings and understandings that brought me up as a child.  I was brought up in an environment where I was told not to forget my roots and always remember to stay humble and kind to each other.   I think I am glad I have made it through everything and I am happy with what I am now. 

Of course, I still want to continue in improving myself - physically and mentally. I plan to work hard and get a law degree, shower more love to my family, get a pet, adopt a child, volunteer, travel to Korea, go to gym, meet a life-long partner, take up music lessons, learn to cook, buy a house, write a book, own a coffee shop, build a home library, meet Oprah Winfrey, attend Celine Dion concert, learn to dance... practically anything, everything, many things!! 

Improve, improve, improve and never settle anything less than perfect. This story is to remind me not to lose faith or give up, because if you think you can do it, and with a positive mindset and objective, you CAN really do it.